Tuesday, 7 October 2008

The finishing line... at last!

Well, on Sunday The Great North Run finally came round and it was time to see how all the training I'd put in faired. I felt pretty good - the little beer gut had disappeared and a slimmer, leaning Alboy (though still short) had taken my place - and the weather was lovely! Considering the weather the day before was blowing glows and pissing with rain, a clear blue sky and a healthy dose of warmth was the least I was expecting. Still, 13 miles is a fair old distance, so it was going to be anything but easy...

What did help pump the adrenaline and keep going to the end was the terrific atmosphere on the route. It was crowded for the 55,000 runners but everyone was polite and lovely when we kept bumbing into each other accidentally. I lost count of the number of bands playing on the route (the def Leppard tribute band was ace) and the locals in Gateshead and South Shields are an admirable lot. Who else would cheer on a bunch of strangers on a Sunday morning rather than watch the Hollyoaks omnibus. Some even provided their own refreshment for the runners on the side of the road in the form of biscuits, ice-pops, water and tissues when they had no real need to, which is, frankly, awesome!

However, the best part of the day was when me and my mate hit the Tyne bridge after a couple of miles. Just as we stepped on seven Red Arrows in a really tight formation screamed overhead at a stupidly low altitude. That got us buzzing! As we stepped off the Tyne bridge they flew back over following the route of the Tyne. Spine-tingling stuff! We did miss out on shaking hands with Chris Hoy and Rebecca Addlington though, as we were on the wrong side of the road when we crossed the start line, but hey-ho, it was still just nice to see a couple of Olympic gold medalists as one begins the first of their 13 mile trudge!

All in all, a great occassion. The run went well also. The first 10k was completed in 50 minutes, but I struggled between 10 and 12 miles, where the route, rather punishingly returned to a gradual up hill struggle. The old lactic acid was beginning to kick in around that point! However, I put a good finish in during the last mile, which ensured I just pipped my target time of one hour and 50 minutes. For the record, I ran 13.1 miles in one hour 49 minute and 23 seconds. Lewis beat that however, finishing in an hour and 40 minutes! Good work fella!! And of course the real winner was the MS Society for whom we managed to raise over £650 for. There's nothing quite like the sense of accomplishment you have crossing the finishing line when you have that in mind!



Having finsihed the Great North Run I am now also in a position to officially state that people who run marathons are crazy mad bonkers... my legs have been killing me since and I'm working from home today as I'm certainly not hobbling to work in such pain, and that was only after half distance! Crazy people, I tells you. What's the betting I'll soon be doing the London Marathon, eh?

Wednesday, 1 October 2008

Classic retro-games - #1 Cannon Fodder

When I finally get round to writing my "Big Book of Computer Gaming History" one software development company will feature prominently from the late eighties and early nineties period. The simple genius of Parallax, a multi-directional shoot 'em up that was one of the first Commodore 64 games to utilise parallax scrolling, and the off-beat daftness of Wizball would normally be enough to have Chris Yates' and Jon Hare's Sensible Software in any gaming Hall of Fame. But when you consider these are the same chaps that also brought gamers the wonderful pin-stick sprites and superior gameplay of the best footy game ever made - the magnificent Sensible Soccer - you realise these guys should be revered just a little more than the teams of 3-D model designers and programmers working on many an average next generation console game today. And then there's Cannon Fodder. A simple top-down view, point and click shoot 'em up that courted controversy for glorifying war at the time of its release, yet remains a true classic thanks to it's sly, sardonic humour and has left one hell of a legacy in the gaming world at large. Not bad for a couple of blokes that graduated from Dukes nightclub in Chelmsford!

Cannon Fodder puts you in control of a small outfit of troops (up to a maximum of eight) that charge around 2-D backdrops comprising jungle, arctic, desert, underground bunker and even farmland landscapes. Multi-directional scrolling is employed to generate large maps for your little men to wander and investigate as they look to achieve very simple aims; kill all enemy and destroy all buildings are the only orders of the day! Such orders are relatively easy to follow - pointing and left-clicking on your mouse moves your men about, right mouse clicking has them fire in the direction the cursor is pointed, holding both buttons down allows you to throw a grenade. Your troops can be split into teams along with jumping into the odd vehicle as and when necessary, allowing for more strategic and tactical elements to be employed in later missions. For example, the player may have to split their team into two or more groups, leaving one group to defend an area or route, assigning its control to the game's artificial intelligence, while taking control of the other. Each soldier that survives a mission is promoted and receives a small increase in the rate of fire, accuracy, and range. Lose all your men in a mission and the recruits from boot camp will take their place and start the phase again. Run out of recruits and its game over. And that really is all there is to it in this joyously uncomplicated game. You see the enemy, blow the mothers away before they get you!

Such simplicity makes the game instantly hookable. The first mission is merely a static one-screen map with three enemies. All that is required is too shoot and kill these numpties with the two troops provided. Easy! From there, though, once you've found your way comfortably around, the difficulty level increases appropriately and begins to provide a somewhat huge challenge. 25 missions, often sub-divided into various phases (featuring between two to five different map scenarios) with more enemies invading the screen than you care to imagine means you're likely to be participant in bloody carnage well into the dwindling twilight. That the enemy begin to hide in the jungle undergrowth, deploy rocket launchers (which are a bugger for a full squad of men to dodge), utilise more powerful vehicles such as helicopters and tanks, and generally aim better than your average intergalactic stormtrooper, is only the start of such difficulties. With map sizes getting larger and larger, environmental factors such as trip mines, quicksand, oil barrels, debris from exploding buildings and restless natives (including a comedy farmer who shouts "get of my land" before blasting both barrels in your troops direction) needing to be navigated, Cannon Fodder is certainly not as easy as it may first seem. Ideally, this is the Sensible Software way. Games that are easy to pick up and play but require some time and dedication to master, equals instant addictiveness and enduring longevity.

Additionally, as is also the Sensible Software way, Cannon Fodder features that same offbeat humour and enduring quirkiness as seen in previous titles, which helps to keep the gamer fully engrossed. The graphics closely follow the style of those in Sensible Soccer with player sprites charmingly represented by small detailed stick men, which for the Amiga's capabilities work so effectively against the detailed backdrops. Just watching the men skid along the ground after being impaled by a bullet, or launch into the air at a stupidly ridiculous height after failing to avoid a grenade is a delight. The same can be said when a casualty is not killed outright - the 'ow' and 'ahs' as an enemy lay bleeding to death in a fountain of blood can be described as little else than amusing, because of the quality graphical style. Whilst the in-game sound effects are minimal, each mission is preceded by a rousing rock anthem to get you in the mood for a little blood-letting, followed by a foot-stomping happy track once you've completed the carnage successfully. It is in these small details that make Cannon Fodder as refreshing a game as it is to this day.

Still, many would argue that such in-game facets provides a precedent for the glorification of war, yet as the opening titles say with tongue firmly in cheek; Cannon Fodder is in no way endorsed by the Royal British Legion! Neither is it particularly un-PC. The game merely lampoons war and how most governments have historically regarded the men under their command - as little more than cannon fodder! Additionally the mission objectives of kill all enemy, has a delicious sentiment about it of what the underlying meaning of the 'sweep and clear' objective in Vietnam was really all about. The opening song of "War, has never been so much fun" is only really bettered by the home and away styled footy score at the top of the main game page keeping tally of each sides death count. That the page also contrasts boot hill, which slowly fills with the mass graves of your dead men, and the recruits lining up on a pathway around the hill to recruit into your service, is blackly comic genius. Yes, Cannon Fodder is fairly subversive, but it's this carnival of silliness that gets across a simple message of war being an utter waste of life. Better to play a seriously fun computer game simulating such an event rather than being an active and exploited participant. (See, you really can learn things from computer games!)

The quality of Cannon Fodder is self-evident in that even after 15 years since its original release, a PSP version is still in the making. The demand shouldn't be surprising either, as the legacy of Cannon Fodder lives on in pretty much every real-time-strategy game that has followed since. Command and Conquer owes much to the simplicity of Cannon Fodder, as it does to the more difficult concepts of Populous. Sure, some of the missions are tougher than vindalooed mutton, to the extent that you begin to sob as your new recruits become the literal 'cannon fodder' to ensure progress. Yet there's enough in the style of the game to keep you engrossed and willing to progress despite your men being turned into mince-meat. Indeed, there are few other war games that are likely to be as silly that's for sure, and with the key concept of fun overriding the more strategic sensibilities, Cannon Fodder is easily one of the most enjoyable games ever made for the Amiga. It's still well worth investigating, especially if you're bored of overly complex, soulless real-time strategy games - Cannon Fodder relives what the good old days used to be like. Highly recommended!


Overall - War has never been so much fun! That's the damn truth...