Has my finger shrunk?

Or has my wedding ring increased in mass? It's a curious situation that has so far only offered me further bewilderment. I can accept that whilst training for Big Run t'up North that I lost a fair few pounds all over, returned to my more athletic nature of circa 1997 and hence my fingers became more skeletal than the chubby sausages that had set up home. But whilst the little beer gut is making an effort to resurface, and the addition of wild boar pie to my diet (Borough Market rules) that same sodding finger remains typically stunted with said wedding ring doing its best to slip off and roll down the drain, hence getting me into trouble with the missus. So, what the hell's going on? Does platinum expand when it's brass monkeys outside? Or is my body going through a weird stage with the onset of my birthday, christmas and the recession, whereby the phalanges extend into Freddy Krueger claws whilst the rest of the torso does a Mr Creosote?